Thursday, March 8, 2007

Look Out, Evian, Jesus Is in the Designer Water Biz



You know, if you spell Evian backwards, it spells Naive. Looks like a Linden, California priest has caught on to that concept and is selling 1/2 liters of so-called "Holy Drinking Water" that has been blessed by clergy. Of course, he cautions, it's no substitute for church attendance, or "any other establishment of worship."

The stuff even carries a warning label that reads," If you are a sinner or evil in nature, this product may cause burning, intense heat, sweating, skin irritations, rashes, itchiness, vomiting, bloodshot and watery eyes, pale skin color and oral irritations." Correct me if I'm wrong, but according to the Christian paradigm, we're all sinners and all fall short of the glory et cetera, so that puts everyone on the planet at risk. Of course I'm sure it's not but wouldn't it be interesting though if the water were tainted with, oh, I dunno, e. coli or something? That would sure cause some internal distress and the cool thing is you could blame it on Satan instead of taking responsibility for your own actions.

You can read more here.

Ned Flanders would be downright proud. Wonder if they're hiding some Holy Tequila somewhere...I might have to sign up for summa that.

2 comments:

Flumadiddle said...

Oh Christ on a stick! Wonder what would happen if I drank some.

Romulus Crowe said...

Hm. I'd better leave that alone. Don't think much of their marketing ploy - unless you're perfect this stuff will make you sick. There can't be too many takers for that. Although it worked for tobacco. All the tobacco companies print 'smoke it and die in pain' on the packets, and it sells anyway.

I can't help adding the word 'Batman' whenever I think 'Holy Drinking Water'. That Adam West has a lot to answer for.